In some ways I feel like I’m in elementary school all over again, minus the daily wedgies, but even into adulthood our behavior is often childlike. As the smallest, and seemingly unimportant issues can turn friends into enemies.
The means may have changed, but the end result remains the same when a friendship is lost. The sting still remains from the fourth grade when I wouldn’t trade my fruit roll-up for Ben’s peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Though it was a main course for a side item, I couldn’t complete the transaction because the crusts weren’t cut off the sandwich…plus it was a sour apple flavored roll-up! Ben couldn’t understand my logic and despite me being the only one who saved him from being picked last in gym class, he uttered those dreaded words, “I’m not your friend anymore.”
There is a tremendous amount of sadness and feelings of betrayal when abandoned by a friend. And now adults experience the same heartache when ‘unfriended’ on Facebook. Nothing is more humiliating than realizing that a ‘Friend’ actually made the effort to delete you off of their account. And often it’s over something that is elementary in nature.
I am continuously amazed by the things that people get into a fury over. I recently wrote a column about the new cast for the upcoming season of ‘Dancing with the Stars.’ In it, I attempted to take a good-natured poke at Hines Ward of the Pittsburgh Steelers by accusing him of being a dirty player. Well from the reaction I got from one reader, you would think I reported that he is a terrorist or something. She berated me on my personal Facebook account where I linked the article, defending Ward’s honor and claiming that I know nothing about football. The whole exchange resulted in her saying in not so many words, but just with a click of her mouse, “I’m not your friend anymore.”
Yes, I was ‘unfriended,’ on Facebook. It wasn’t the first time, and probably won’t be the last. The funny part is, just like when I (with the help of my mother) packed my lunch on that fateful day years again, while writing the DTWS column I never expected it would lead to any problems. Just days before I had written about breast feeding, which I thought might generate some comments but I heard nothing about it. Put down a Steeler, and a mini-war breaks out.
Such as in life, in the world of Facebook, friends come and go whether the reasons for separation are merited or not. Sometimes the relationships are healed, but not always. As for Ben, he moved away that summer and I never saw him again. Recently, he sent me a Friend Request on Facebook, I denied it….you know what they say about paybacks.
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